Sadness over failure

I have totally forgotten the word cry since PMR result was release long time ago. My tears already dry out and will never had chance to drain out from my dry eyes. Life had been enexpected and I just have to face it as it come. It had been long that I never meet failure and when failure come, I just dunno how overcome it. Putting a mask and show there is nothing happen is totally not me.

As I know, my failure in exam will be spread around the whole university in just seconds. How funny when i arrive uni no body ever think I fail of exam. They have over estimate me. I m just the same creature in earth. the same creature who can make mistake, face failure and error.Never I thought of keeping it as secret. Just let anyone know it. Just make fun of it and I will show no response. I learn that things always come with reasons.

Cry!! Suddenly I feel my eye want to run away from getting dry anymore. My heart is never as happy as I want and my brain is not in the current situation. All this come to fast. Too fast to accept. Too fast to really adopt to it. I tell my self, never never let any tears out of my dry eye.

It have been a long day. 2 hours journey back I call more than 20 peoples, receive more than 10 calls, 20SMS'es to change all my plan. It was god faith to test my patient, the destiny to make me more brave. Never I thought I will blame anyone for my own failure. This 2 hours journey is the journey of sadness and transformation of my life. Yong Joo will never be the same Yong Joo again. I will never let failure roam in my life.

"YJ kampate", "YJ try your best", "We are behind you.Never give up", and "Good Luck Eddie" really make me more energetic and motivated to continue my unclear path. I see this over my phone, msn nick and almost everywhere.

I Dunno how to describe my feeling now. A sad and disappointed feeling but I can just laugh and smile to anything in front of me. Feeling nothing...I am not wearing a mask in me but this show how I had accept this challenge or maybe the greatest challenge ever in my life. Is just another failure and I have to take as it come. Thanks to all sms, msn message, nick, email and more and thanks for the concern. I will never let all your good word down and I will try my very best to fight this battle until the last drop of blood and the last breath that God can give me. Thanksssss..

"Failure is nothing if you overcome it. It is just another small error in life that make you stronger and competitive"