The emo is back

September always seem to be a emo side of me....All the negative 'chi' seem to visit me this month.

I am a very bad tempered guy since I was very young. My mom call me the crazy bull when I was young. When I lose my control, i throw everything, i shout and i cry....but that was when I very young.

I just dunno when I change....I was totally not the same eddie as what i am when i was in primary school....

nowadays when i am very unhappy, music become my therapy....Yeah, let the music heal the soul....

People always said gals are more easy to lost their emo compare to guys. Guys are generally more stable and strong. However i believe, guy do have the weak side as well. How ego a guy can be? How strong can a guy be? We are still human......

Can't guy cry? can't guy have it weak time too?

Close friend of mine know that if I listen to sad song especially 'My Heart will go on' or 'You Raise me up' again and again, it would mean that I am sad. It was just the same as what I am feeling now....

Life is not a easy journey and we walk our way through no matter how hard it was. For some, easy solution is commit suicide but majority of us find inner strength that keep us going....

Some part of life, it feel like we are in Titanic movie....The journey that suppose to be happy turn out to be disaster and it was so difficult to decide whether should I jump or not....

Some part of life, it feel like we are in Mulan, when we see the reflection, we fail to recognize who we are....

Life is no easy my friend.......

For gals if they are sad, maybe they will find a friend, cry overnight and the next day would be another day....

For guys, most of us just put it into their heart and let the heart go on and on.... I remember that my friend has once come to me and told me his difficulty. He cried...My tear almost drop...Although it was hopeless at that moment, but both of us feel so relieve...

So I strongly agreed that guys can speak up rather than keep it to themselves. If egoism do matter, find other solution such as go Broga Hill and shout as loud as you want!

For me.......the music therapy do help....Though it was slow...

I just close my eye and let my sleep carry away by the Song....Because I know 'My Heart will go on' and one day I will find 'Hero' in myself that will 'raise me up'........Just hope tonight, the music will really heal my soul....