It had been a long 7 months for me in audit. Like it or not, I would said I am still surviving in the arena. But how long will I survive? It remain a question...
4 years ago, when I make my decision that I am going to Accounting line, I had set a goal for myself. You might think I am dreaming but I dream way big and I am ambitious. I want to own my own firm and one secret way to make this firm the best firm is .... secret ..... I still strongly think it was possible and my secret way had not yet been leak out. Never would you know...
4 years now....My dream remain a dream though I already get the feel of audit. My dream seem near but the nearer it is to me, the more it fade away. I would said my spirit fade away. My heart were no longer the 101%...it is just now 99%
Today, arriving office, I was totally shock that I need to go to client place alone without early notice. It was quite isolated but i manage to call a taxi shark that charge me crazily to go to that place. My job is simple, making sure I finish 13 company review in 5 hours...It was possible I know...I have done that many times...Once I arrive the meeting room, putting down the bag, the client come in and without giving me a chance to even greet her, I was scold for as long as 5 minutes. It seem unreasonable for her to scold me as I was totally working under senior instruction and yet I dunno what the hack is she scolding. I work as it was statutory for them to be audited and because their account was so bad, it is drag till so long....
The travel was long and rush. Half and hour after my arrival back to office, the client wanted the account ready. It is possible I know....because we are train to be fast....Bullet will never pass through us because we know we are faster than the bullet...
Today dinner was superbly the best one. Lot of talking, lot of misunderstanding and lot of laughter. Seem like all of us was infected with audit disease. A new disease that can make auditor laugh non stop and yet be sad anytime...We were all workaholic, working until we forgot the shape of TV because we never even bother to see the TV...but worst, worst enough that auditor think chicken have 4 feet...weird enough that rabbit only have 2 leg, weird enough that mice have 2 leg...
What is leg gotta do with audit....Do we audit legs?? We are having dinner at Chow Kit road, the road full with yellow chicken...I was joking with my friend who wanted to eat KFC so much....I said "Hey, you want eat chicken, so many chicken behind...Duck aslo got"....She reply "Hey, I don't eat chicken with 2 leg"... Sure enough she work till forgot that chicken only have 1 pair of leg...
Life is getting tougher. Office politic, a bit or more will affect the mood of work... Demotivation, tiredness, laziness have all pouring in and it really affect productivity...Sometime, in any point of time, there is a feeling of throwing all responsibility, throw a letter and just walk out...But I do not have such a guts...Yes..I am chicken when come to this issue...
My life goes on despite is was hectic and so does millions of other auditors in the world....My only motivation is friend...Friendship at workplace....True enough there is no 100% friendship in workplace compare to in University...but it was enough to have a bunch of friend, joking, having lunch, having dinner, go to class together, walk to LRT, and wave goodbye when the train arrive at the respective station.
Sound emo? It might be....But it will be more emo if I found the guts of walking away....It will never be so soon or might never happen, but it was unsure when will the guts visit me...
1.32am...Alone, listening to repeated songs, I update this blog. Is because of you all, friends, I am surviving now. Friend and family are my biggest motivation. Thanks...I will continue to survive till the day I lost my spirit...